Friday, 27 September 2013


Yesterday was quite the interesting day for us.

In the afternoon I put the kids down for their naps, left them with my sister and headed to my 20 week ultrasound.  Hubby was teaching a class and wasn't able to sneak away to come with me to the ultrasound so I went in alone.

I am half done this pregnancy and I can't imagine what these next 20 weeks will hold with how busy the first 20 have been. I am sure it will fly by, if all the stuff that is planned over the next few weeks is any indicator of what is to come.

Our last ultrasound was a little over 4 weeks ago and we were really just having another one to double check all of the measurements again and to see if the mark on the heart was still there.

The mark is still there but the heart is functioning normally from what they can tell and there are no other signs of birth defects or trisomy 21.   Everything looks on schedule for the little one to arrive middle of February.


There was one teeny, tiny little difference between this scan and the last one.

Remember this photo?

That was what the Dr gave us as proof since we were both so shocked to hear that it was a BOY!

Well. Yesterday, was completely different. 
Apparently, its a GIRL!!

Little A was so shocked and excited when we told her.  

Her exact words were, " I...I prayed for a girl, alll day!!"   She was physically shaking with excitement. 

We are all a little in shock again after the crazy change of events, but I have to say that I was not surprised. When they told me it was a boy I didn't know what to think. Everything in me was telling me it was a girl and all of the dreams I have had about this baby were of it being a girl. So hearing it was a boy in the first place was what really threw me and took me a long time to adjust to but I still had my doubts. 

The most interesting part was the Ultrasound Doctors face as he tried to apologize for his mistake.  He was totally shocked to not find a penis yesterday and went back to check more than 4 times.  He couldn't get over it. "Honestly, by looking at the scans from last time I would still tell you that this baby is a boy, I was 99% positive. But seeing things today, obviously its not a boy, it just doesn't make sense."

Hubby's response was only that Little A must have been praying really really hard. 

My mom's response is that it could still be twins, one boy and one girl. (I don't think its possible unless one is amazing at hiding) 

Mostly, we are all just really excited to know that everything is looking good and we can just enjoy the next 20 weeks and see what God has in store for us and our growing family. 

Hard to image this skull with a cute little nose and chubby little cheeks but I can't wait to see them.

Thursday, 26 September 2013

Thank You

This week was/is Deaf Awareness Week!

I just wanted to send out a quick Thank You to all of the wonderful Deaf and Hard of Hearing people in my life.  

Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!

You have not only enriched my life by welcoming me and my family into your community, you have enriched three generations of our family and it will continue. 

Thank you for allowing me to use your language to make my kids more brilliant. Sign Language has been such a huge part of our kids lives and they are all the better for it.  Yours, is a beautiful language, Thank you for sharing it with us.  

Thank you!  For being forgiving when we mess up and use the wrong signs. For trying so hard to understand us as we fumble and slowly go through a sentence. And for repeating yourself more than what should be necessary as we struggle to watch your hands move so fluidly and beautifully as you speak to us and others.  

I am so proud to know you and humbled to be welcomed into your community.  

This is a video made by the Deaf Professional Arts Network.  My kids love watching them and trying to sign along with them.   Enjoy. 

Wednesday, 25 September 2013

Love is... Motivational

Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.
Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

One of the best blessings that I have received being married to my wonderful hubby is that when I fall down, he lifts me up. He is consistently trying to help and encourage me in all that I do. (Of course there are always things he doesn't notice that I was hoping he would but when he does notice things, he is very encouraging and thoughtful)

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.

Ephesians 4:29

The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life,    but the mouth of the wicked conceals violence.

Proverbs 10:11

I could easily talk about this coming from the perspective of a lot of women and say that most of the time we end up having to motivate our husbands. Most often we do this by making them "Honey do" lists or by nagging. But instead of beating a dead horse, I am going to show you this from the perspective of the person being "motivated". 

I am not a good housekeeper. My house is a disaster most of the time. We live here and I often put the cleaning and organising at the bottom of the list because I would rather just be spending time with my family doing things. 

I am also a lot like my dad and I get super distracted while doing a task and I end up doing 8 other tasks at the same time so it takes me hours to fully finish cleaning a room. (But that's because I have also taken a stray sock to another room which led me to clean something there before heading to a different room and then back to the task at hand after about half an hour.  Its rather frustrating and takes a lot for me to just sit and do one thing)

This drives my husband crazy.  His mom was and is a stay at home mom. Hubby grew up on a farm and his mom was always there cooking and cleaning and helping when she was needed out in the yard.  Their house was always clean, at least from what hubby can remember. It was also always his moms job to clean and cook and his Dad was always working elsewhere.  His dad rarely helped clean because he had other things he had to do, and he only just recently started to put his dishes into the sink or dishwasher. (they have been off the farm for almost 6 years)

Over the years of our marriage we have talked argued about cleaning the house more times than I can count.  About a year into marriage, while both of us were working outside of the home, Hubby decided he needed to help me out. I think he caught onto the fact that if he wanted it done his way, in his time, he would have to help. We would work together and get the entire house fully cleaned each Saturday morning.  It was wonderful. Now that we have kids it doesn't always work out like that and normally one of us takes the kids and the other tries to clean. 

There have been a number of times in our marriage when Hubby has tried to motivate me to clean and organise the way he wants it. He has tried the male version of nagging (I would say its very different than how a woman would do it but it is still quite frustrating).  He has made little "jokes" or remarks about it to me or to our friends and family, that were funny to everyone but hurtful for me to hear. 

But honestly, best thing that he has done, that actually motivates me, was to encourage me when I was working at it and get excited when I finished something.  He has actually gotten really good at noticing when I have made a little change or effort to clean and organise. He tries to help me out however I need it and is always encouraging and understanding. (It helps that he has tried to watch the kids all day and clean the house and was unsuccessful) 

Iron sharpens iron,
    and one man sharpens another.

Proverbs 27:17

A joyful heart is good medicine,
    but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.

Proverbs 17:22

A soft answer turns away wrath,
    but a harsh word stirs up anger.

Proverbs 15:1

I am sure that you have heard many times that "You can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar".  It is totally true with children, positive reinforcement will always produce better results than using negative reinforcement alone. It is also true with our spouses, they will feel more loved and respected if we celebrate their successes and kindly talk about our desires than if we nag them for it all the time and act like they never get anything right.  

How would you feel if your spouse only used negative reinforcement to motivate you?
Are we sharpening each other or are we cutting into each other?

And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.
Hebrews 10:24-25

This is my challenge for us this week: 

Try to discover how to "stir up" or motive your spouse. You can do this by trying out different love languages or by having a real, honest and open discussion. 
Ask them what speaks to them to feel encouraged and lifted up.  Ask if there is anything you are doing that is not encouraging (and listen to their honest answer without biting their head off). 

Work at showing appreciation for the things that your spouse does do instead of getting angry about the things they don't do. 

Monday, 23 September 2013


Now we have received not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, that we might understand the things freely given us by God.  And we impart this in words not taught by human wisdom but taught by the Spirit, interpreting spiritual truths to those who are spiritual.
1 Corinthians 2:12–13

My sister and brother in law have both been talking a lot lately about personality tests.  My Brother in law has been doing a lot of them for work lately as part of the Church staff, all of the staff are taking them so that they can better understand themselves and how they work and how they can work better with each other. 

One of the test that they took was to discover your spiritual gifts.  

I have always felt like I knew what my giftings were, I have never taken a test about it before though and thought it would be interesting.  I can be slightly sceptical so I figured it wouldn't really show me much or be very accurate. 

My BIL posted a link to the test that they were taking and I spent the few minutes to fill it out. 
I was totally shocked. 
These were my results: 

Ad= AdministrationTotal:21
Di= DiscernmentTotal:30
Ev= EvangelismTotal:27
Ex= ExhortationTotal:31
Fa= FaithTotal:35
Gi= GivingTotal:24
Kn= KnowledgeTotal:31
Le= LeadershipTotal:26
Me= MercyTotal:30
Pa= PastorTotal:31
Pr= ProphecyTotal:20
Se= ServingTotal:23
Te= TeachingTotal:31
Wi= WisdomTotal:30

They say that I am Faith, Teaching, and Pastor. 

Two of those I can understand, the last, Pastor, totally confuses me. 
I have never, ever thought of myself in this light before. 

But the funny thing is, that my brother in law, totally called.  He actually suggested yesterday that I should put a link on my blog so that I could be reached for speaking engagements.  YIKES! 

I have to say, I kinda laughed in his face and told him he was nuts, I could never get up and speak let alone write a sermon.   I am totally not a public speaker nor would I ever be able to get up and do a sermon. Talking, really doesn't freak me out, but getting up in front of a church and preaching, I would probably pee my pants ( well maybe not, but I would likely vomit).  

My brothers only jolting response, was that I write a sermon every time I blog. 

Today his comment rang true in my ears as I read the results from my test.  Wowza. Not at all what I expected.  

I have done public speaking before and it really did go over quite well, despite me sweating profusely and feeling sick for days before. And I am totally comfortable speaking to a smaller group of people, or large groups of children ( really, those little guys don't scare me at all, I can be a goof in front of the kids just fine, but bring their parents in and I will turn fire engine red ) but I don't see myself getting up in front of a churchfull a adults to share, it just doesn't feel like thats my calling.  

 I guess we will see, maybe its something I'll grow into. 

God has given each of you a gift. Use it to help each other. This will show God’s loving-favor.  If a man preaches, let him do it with God speaking through him. If a man helps others, let him do it with the strength God gives. So in all things God may be honored through Jesus Christ. Shining-greatness and power belong to Him forever. Let it be so.
1 Peter 4:10-11

Please check out the test,  and let me know if it revealed some new giftings or just reiterated what you already knew about yourself. 

Find the test here at

Friday, 20 September 2013

Love is... Forgiveness

* I totally had my own plan on how these Love is... posts would go but am feeling led to put them in a slightly different order. I guess God's plan is a little different than my own, (I was going to go in the order of 1 Corinthians and then add some extras here and there) I  trust that his way is better and that it will all makes sense when its all said and done. *

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

1 Corinthians 13:4-8

This is a hard one for me.  The part of 1 Corinthians 13 when they get to, keeps no record of wrongs, that always gets me.  Not that I am any shining star in any of the other categories either, but that one has always been a struggle for me. 

There is a show that Hubby and I have watched a bit on tv where the husband keeps this record he calls "the bank".  Every time that he messes up really badly and his wife is really upset, he goes to his computer, opens up "the bank" and uses one of the records of her wrongdoings. He often uses them to defuse the situation and turn it away from him getting in trouble for his mistake but instead tries to turn them into "teaching" opportunities for his wife.  

Hubby and I both chuckled at the hijinks of it all as she found out and exploded on him. But this idea is something that I think so many people, in a lesser sense, do.  We often save up our spouses wrongs so that we can hold them over them at a later date.  We may accept an apology and move on from the situation, but we hold onto the hurt and frustrations from it and don't really let go. 

In my lifetime I have seen this so many times.  I don't want to air dirty laundry so I will use alias' since its not my story to tell. 

Alice and Jim are loud arguers. They raise their voices on a regular basis and are not afraid of a full out yelling match.  Jim often accuses Alice of holding onto their past fights and using them against him.  Alice accuses Jim of the same thing.  Nearly every time they argue, they don't remain on the same topic for long, old issues always come up.  Alice and Jim also rarely say that they are sorry. They can go for days without speaking to each other and one of them will often leave the house to end a disagreement that isn't going how they want. Fights are normally over when things are less heated and they are forced to talk to each other again because of family gatherings, the kids, or other life events. 

We all make many mistakes. If anyone does not make a mistake with his tongue by saying the wrong things, he is a perfect man. It shows he is able to make his body do what he wants it to do.

James 3:2 (NLT)

We are all imperfect people trying to love imperfect people. 

We all make mistakes.  

For all men have sinned and have missed the shining-greatness of God.

Romans 3:23 (NLT)

This is a perfect photo of me while I am not so impressed.  My face shows it all and my Brother in Law captured it perfectly.  I am not very good at hiding it if I am displeased or frustrated about something, let alone angry.

So, how do we walk out a life of showing love by forgiving our spouse? 

The bible gives us some great verses telling us that we need to forgive the wrong doings of others just like God has forgiven us. 

Who is a God like You, Who forgives sin and the wrong-doing of Your chosen people who are left? He does not stay angry forever because He is happy to show loving-kindness. He will again have loving-pity on us. He will crush our sins under foot. Yes, You will throw all our sins into the deep sea. You will be true to Jacob and show loving-kindness to Abraham, as You promised our fathers in days long ago.
Micah 7:18-20

Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.
Ephesians 4:31-32

Jesus speaks to Peter in Matthew 18 and tells him that he must forgive his brother seventy seven times. But in Luke Jesus goes even farther than forgiveness. He challenges his followers to not just forgive, but to love our enemies, and do good to those that hate us, turn our cheek and give to everyone who asks or takes from us. 

Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.
Matthew 18:21-22

 “But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you. To one who strikes you on the cheek, offer the other also, and from one who takes away your cloak do not withhold your tunic either. Give to everyone who begs from you, and from one who takes away your goods do not demand them back.And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them."
Luke 6:27-31

So in showing love by walking in forgiveness we need to actually practice real, honest forgiveness.  Forgiveness that actually moves on from the wrong doing, that does not hold onto it or store it for revenge at a later time.  

When we can walk in real forgiveness we walk in freedom from bitterness and revenge and anger that builds up when we don't let go of the wrong doing.  If we hold onto even the smallest part instead of forgiving, we allow a foothold in our marriage.  We allow there to be a weakened spot for the enemy to use against us and build onto.  Eventually that foothold will become a stronghold in our marriage and will take a lot of work to knock down and move on from. 

This week, my challenge to you is again multiple challenges ( but I am sure you can handle it) :

1. Pray that God would help you to be more like Christ called us to be, not easily offended, blessing of those that hate us, and forgiving of those who wrong us.  (Specifically toward our spouses but also in that it would spread to our whole lives)

Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense.
Proverbs 19:11

2. Walk in real forgiveness this week. Try to forgive quickly, even without apology, and truly move on from the wrong doing instead of saving it for later or holding onto the anger or hurt. 

Let me know how it goes.   Blessings. 

Thursday, 19 September 2013

Scone Fail turned Must Try Success!

This morning my sister and I were hosting a coffee playdate with two of our friends. I woke up with a strong urge to bake and have been craving anything pumpkin or pumpkin spiced so I decided to make us some pumpkin scones.

I found a great looking recipe online and began to make it while the kids were finishing their breakfast.

Recipe and Site found here ...

I have to set the stage for you because it is not often that I screw up on recipes and there really was multiple things against me this morning as I tried to bake.

First, my kids were very loud this morning and every time I got back to baking I would be asked (hollered at)  to fetch some other item for their breakfast. "I finished my milk can I have juice, pleeeease!"  "mama! mama! more!more!"

Secondly, I am pregnant and it was morning.  Enough said.

Lastly, I was trying to be a nice sister and I was making two sets of pumpkin scones at the same time. My sister, the one living with us, is Gluten intolerant so she doesn't eat gluten and therefore has to use special types of flour.  Being a nice sister I decided to finish off the can of Pumpkin in special scones for her using her gluten free all purpose flour.

So there you have it, screaming kids, distracted pregnant mom, and two bowls of very similar things on my ridiculously overcrowded counter.   My mistake was totally not entirely my fault.

Just as my sister is coming upstairs with my cute, chubby little nephew, I am ready to roll out the scone dough (which should resemble biscuits).  It looks nothing like it should.  I am supposed to be able to form it into a ball and roll it out to cut it into cute little triangle shapes.

My dough is a giant blob.  It has the consistency of cookie dough, mushy, sticky cookie dough.  There is no way that I am going to be able to for it into a ball let alone roll it and cut it nicely.

Our friends should be at our place anytime now. My snack is a total fail and I am ready to throw it away without cooking it.  But my sister suggests that it will still taste okay, it just may have to cook longer or something.

So we scoop it out, plop it onto the pan and toss it into the oven.

They smelled wonderful.  They looked a little funny, and had to be cooked a little longer but when they were finished they were quite tempting.

I warn our guests that these will likely be horribly disappointing but I take one quickly to try them before our guests have to taste something terrible.


They were not at all a scone. But that just reminded me that I don't like scones all that much. Scones are dry and need to have butter or something to save them from drying out your mouth with every bite.
But these things, these were moist and pumpkiny and sweet and spicey and almost like a light cakey biscuit.

Seriously, I can't tell you how great they were.  We all ate more than one.  One of our friends got the recipe but says she will only ever make them wrong because they were amazing.

So I thought I had to share.   This was not originally my recipe. But the change that I made makes a world of difference.

Also, I apologise for the lack of pictures.  I really thought that these were a fail and I didn't think to make them pretty while scooping them out or drizzling glaze on them.  You will just have to try me and the opinion of my friends and brother in law,  these are way better than the name I gave them implies.

Pumpkin Spice  (Better than) Scones 

Combine in a medium bowl: 
2 cups all-purpose flour  (or gluten free all purpose flour)
7 Tablespoons granulated sugar
1 Tablespoon baking powder
½ teaspoon salt
½ teaspoon ground cinnamon
½ teaspoon ground nutmeg
¼ teaspoon ground cloves
¼ teaspoon ground ginger

Cut in with pastry knife (or your hands)
6 Tablespoons cold butter  until crumbs resemble oats.
In a Separate bowl, Mix together 
1/2 Can of pumpkin  ( The Can of pumpkin I used would normally make 2 pies)
3 Tablespoons milk ( I use whole milk)
1 large egg

Add wet ingredients to dry ingredients and mix until just combined.  Drop buy the spoonful onto lightly greased or parchment lined baking pan.  
Bake at 350 degrees for 14-18 minutes.  Baking time varies greatly by the size of your dough blobs, they are done when a toothpick comes out clean and if you break into one it looks moist but not raw. 

Allow to cool slightly and top with glaze. ( 1 cup icing sugar, two Tbsp milk (or eggnog or chai tea, really whatever you want))

Wednesday, 18 September 2013

Cellular Freedom

No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.
1 Corinthians 10:13 

A few years back Hubby and I decided that instead of going the normal route and getting a land line for our new home, we would just both have cell phones.  We had both had cells in the past but were in need of new phones and both of us had been on pay as you go type plans.  

We made sure to have good long distance coverage on our phone plans, so that we could still call our family and friends out of town without paying a fortune.  Then we set out picking phones. 
Thats my sister, isn't she cute :)

Both of us got Iphones. We were both very excited to get some great apps and fun new games.  

I wish someone had stopped us before we got them and shook us back to reality. But all we ever heard was how wonderful the Iphone was and how great this app or that app was.  

Biggest mistake of the last few years?   HAVING AN IPHONE!

Don't get me wrong, I have enjoyed it. And I am sure it would have been just as big of a mistake if it was any other kind of "smart" phone. 

What a waste of half of my brain, my attention, and my time. 

If we all stopped and seriously looked at how much time we actually spend on our phones distracted from the things that are actually important and happening all around us, we would be appalled.  

So, today I did it. Today I got rid of every app on my phone ( well all but my bible app and some for the kids). It is now just a phone. There are no games or apps calling my name and pulling me from what is actually important to me.  

I have tried to do this once before but to a much lesser extent. I got rid of all "unnecessary" apps and just left all the ones that actually get used.   But really that didn't keep me from using the apps that were there.  This time I went all in and I am so excited. 

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.
Philippians 4:8

There are always so many things in this world to distract us from the things that we should be focusing on.  Philippians 4 lays it out for us about what we should be thinking about and holding onto.  But we often move away from focus on those things and allow all of the darkness of this world to sneak in and cloud our vision.  

In context that passage gives us so much more to think about.  It offers us something greater than all of the distractions that could pull at our focus.  

Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.
Philippians 4:4-9

Friday, 13 September 2013

Love is... Respect

I am very excited to introduce you to the beginning of a New Series that I am doing for Deliberate Love

 The "Love is?" Challenge...

This is a Challenge that I am working on putting together for you all with the help of my sister and some other lovely ladies. The Series will be all about working towards showing Love and Respect to our spouse in a way that really speaks to them.  

We all struggle with showing love. We all can improve.  And this is by no means a step by step plan that will guarantee that you and your spouse will get along better, feel more connected, or even like each other more.  But I hope and pray that it does.   And if it doesn't, keep trying, keep praying and don't stop working at it.   

I saw a great comic or picture the other day( cant remember where I found it but it has stuck in my mind). The picture showed an old couple celebrating their 50th anniversary or something, and the conversation went as follows. " I can't believe we have been married for so long!"  "Well, we come from a time when people would fix whats broken not just throw it away." 

We have been called to walk a different path than the rest of the world. We are not to take the easy way out and we have to work really hard to keep holy what God intended for his glory but we screw up so badly sometimes  all the time. 

Don't copy the behaviour and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God's will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect. 
This is Us! I realized I haven't posted a recent
photo of me and my Handsome Hubby. 
Romans 12:2 NLT

So here it goes. I hope you come along for the ride.  Subscribe or follow if you want, that way you can get emails sent to your inbox when a new post is up. 

(Also,  At the end of the challenge there will be a give away!!)

1.  Love is...Respect 

Little A is a total encourager. She is constantly telling us how great we are at things and how well we are doing different tasks. She is always finding something to encourage us with. 

Hubby has been working on finishing up our basement bathroom. Little A was "helping" him with tiling the shower. Really, all she was doing was holding a screwdriver and watching her daddy work, but she was also encouraging him and keeping him company which is something he loves. 

"Ohhh, Daddy, they are so beautiful. You are doing such a great job."

A few days before that, I had some hair extensions in and she immediately responded with, " Mommy, You look amazing. Just like a princess." 

I have heard things like, "Daddy is a really good worker." 
"You look really pretty today mommy. I like your outfit."
"Aunty, your a really good mommy. And so am I." (referring to her Minnie Mouse toy)

Sometimes I am totally blown away by my little encourager.  A lot of her character qualities and little quirks come from her dad and myself, but with this, I can't take the credit, I don't encourage nearly enough.  It feels like she has developed this amazing quality all on her own.  She just loves to lift people up and that makes me so happy.  

We do try to encourage her as much as we can and we really do try to use positive reinforcement as much as possible in our parenting. But they way that Little A does it, it seems like a gifting. It goes beyond just trying to copy how we speak to her, she goes out of her way to say something nice. 

The tongue can bring death or life;
those who love to talk will reap the consequences.
Proverbs 18:21

You brood of snakes! How could evil men like you speak what is good and right? For whatever is in your heart determines what you say.
Matthew 12:34

Out of our hearts come the words that we speak. 
How we think and feel about our spouse becomes what we say about them, be it to them or about them when they are not around.  

I am totally guilty of saying disrespectful things about my husband when he is not around.  I may not speak disrespect to his face that often ( I am guilty of that too), but when I am out with friends the conversation often turns to the frustrations that are going on in our lives and lets be honest, thats often our kids and our husbands.   

Mark Driscoll talks about The Respectful Wife in his book and in a sermon series that he did for Mars Hill Church. It can be found online Here and is amazing, the whole series is. One of the things that he calls women out on is that even when we get together in bible studies and women's groups at the church, we often sit around and disrespect our spouses.  We may word it as a prayer request but what we say about our spouse often ends up being us talking badly about them. 

I feel so loved, blessed and lifted up by the little encouragements that I get from my daughter. Hubby feels lifted up and respected when I encourage him, when I show him respect with my words. 

Just like the verse at the beginning of the post says, Romans 12:2, we need to let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think.  We need God to change how we think about our husband and that will change the words that come out of our mouth towards him or about him. 

So for the challenge this week, my challenge is threefold. 

Firstly, pray for you and your spouse as you embark in this and ask for God's help and guidance on how to make this work the best for you and your Hubby.

Secondly, think nice thoughts about your husband, write them down if you have to, make a list, whatever it takes, but remember all those amazing qualities that drew you to him and that make you love him. (whats in your heart determines what you say)

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. 
Phillipians 4:8

Lastly, hold your tongue.  If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. 

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.
1 Thessalonians 5:11

Please let me know how its going, I would love to hear from you. I will be struggling along side of you and would love to be encouraged knowing I am not alone in this.  Blessings.