Tuesday, 13 November 2012


There is a time for everything,
    and a season for every activity under the heavens:
    a time to be born and a time to die,
    a time to plant and a time to uproot,
     a time to kill and a time to heal,
    a time to tear down and a time to build,
     a time to weep and a time to laugh,
    a time to mourn and a time to dance,
     a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
    a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
     a time to search and a time to give up,
    a time to keep and a time to throw away,
     a time to tear and a time to mend,
    a time to be silent and a time to speak,
     a time to love and a time to hate,
    a time for war and a time for peace.
Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

When we got married our pastor and officiant was my hubbies Uncle Brian. He is a wonderful man of God and a Pastor at a church where my parents live. He was the perfect man for the job because, obviously, Aaron knew him well and he was also a friend of my family.

Our ceremony was beautiful. I hardly remember what was said other than our vows and saying I do. It was such a blur and we were just so excited and nervous and caught up in the moment.

I do remember that our pastor talked about time. How important it is to take time for each other, time for God, and time for ourselves.  I would love to be able to fill you in on all the details of the sermon, which I have been told was very well done and memorable, but like I said I cannot remember it.

Hubby and I have now been married for almost 5 years. And they have been wonderful. In that time God has blessed us with a beautiful home that we had the pleasure and headache of renovating together. God blessed us as hubby finished his schooling and got a wonderful job.  God brought us closer together and taught us how to love each other through pain when we miscarried. We have been taught new things everyday after having our daughter and son, and God is showing us the love of the father.  Our time together has been greatly blessed.  For better or worse, richer or poorer and through sickness and health God has blessed us.

The last five years have been amazing, hard at times (but growth and change doesn't normally come easily).  Looking back on those years, the best moments have been when we were spending time together.  Time away on vacations. Time mourning together. Time praying together.  Time rejoicing together.

Pastor Brian was completely right (from what I can remember). It is the most important thing we can do for and with each other is to take time.

Since I cannot remember the sermon, I found this great article while looking through the Focus on the Family website, about spending time together.

Read the whole article by Bill and Pam Farrel, cofounders of Love Wise, written for Focus on the Family,  here.

"Couples need T.I.M.E. together. Here is what we see as the minimum time commitment you should have to maintain (not to deepen or grow a relationship, but just maintain the minimum connectedness needed for a healthy, strong marriage with a little red-hot monogamy):

Ten to 20 minutes to talk together alone every day. (Time in the car with the kids listening doesn’t count.)

Invest in a weekly date night (or date breakfast or lunch) together for at least four hours. (It takes a couple hours to emotionally connect, and then you want to leave at least a few minutes for sex.)

Make a monthly "day away" policy. At least once a month spend eight to twelve uninterrupted hours together to reconnect. You can spend the time doing things you both enjoy: errands, shopping, exercising, or a relaxing activity or hobby. Be sure you have the house to yourselves (or at least your bedroom) for a few moments of red-hot monogamy sometime during this special day together.

Escape quarterly (or at least biannually) for a 48-hour weekend."

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